Sorry for the lateness everyone. It seems rural Pennsylvania isn’t known for having free wifi.
I should formerly inform everyone what it is I’m doing and my reasons why….
Well, I’m riding my bicycle from Brooklyn(BK) to LA(city of angels). Yes, this is the same Schwinn roadie I bought from my friend Fernanda back in BK some 3 years ago. Before you question why I would use a Schwinn from the mid 80s, let me inform you that I’ve invested major for the bike to handle the payload and the longevity of this adventure. Not to mention the necessary gear and clothing to help me to the finish line.
For the better part of 8 or 9 years I’ve been dealing with depression, lying and guilt. This has not only hurt loved ones but myself. To carry an unnecessary burden for so many years makes me question why I would do this to myself. A year or two after graduating high school the lies began and they eventually ballooned into several more than I could handle and friends and family began to notice. I left Santa Paula, my hometown, and Brooklyn because I couldn’t contain the lies. I felt like I could move to a new town and start new… fresh… a clean slate. Though I would relocate, my past and ease of lying would surface. I always had a preconceived notion that success on any level would make myself more attractive to family, friends, current/former girlfriends and the casual stranger. The ability to lie had a negative effect on my psyche. I became unmotivated to even finish a semester of school, didn’t want to venture to new and wonderful places, etc. I became depressed. It wasn’t until I had emotionally hurt my girlfriend that this had to stop, not just for our relationship but for myself both present and future. I want to feel good… I want to feel happy… I want to feel loved. She was the first person I had ever told as to how I was feeling for several years. It goes without saying that the conversation was heavily emotional but the weight lifted from my shoulders was indescribable. I then told my parents, brother, sister and select friends shortly thereafter. For several months I’ve been under the guidance of professional help and feel worlds better but know there is still more work to done.
I choose to do this ride for personal discovery, self discipline, to see this beautiful country and it’s people and for an unforgettable journey.
I’m ready to be happy….
Sea 2 Shining Sea 
Bravo cousin. What a grand journey it will be!
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Be safe, very courageous and thought provoking. Stuff like this could make a good book.
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Wow, cousin!! What a courageous person you are to truly face your demons. I am immensely proud of this journey that your are taking to discovery yourself. I know you will find that something that you are looking for to feel whole again. I love you and am excited to live through your adventure for the next few weeks
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Well Mark, it takes a real man to admit such personal emotions. I’m glad you finally confided in your friends & family, and it’s good you are seeking professional help. This will be quite an adventure for you, and I’m sure it will be life changing for you. Everyone deserves love & happiness, to settle for anything less is just not living life to the fullest. You have always been a dear friend to Adam, and we always enjoyed taking you with us on camping trips. You were a joy to have around, always very pleasant. I hope this adventure is a successful lifelong experience. May God watch over you, keep you safe, healthy & happy. Sincerely, Terri (Adam’s Mom)
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You deserve to be happy, go find it and never let it go! You are an amazing person, I want to wish you with the best of luck in this journey you’ve set out for yourself!
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Do what you have to do to get threw it , it is all apart of life and being an adult, please yourself before others . You dont have to prove anything to anyone , I know are parents like to brag or blow thing up out of porportion they only want the best for US. As for me I do what I want to do and I try not to please others , I live life on my own terms , screw everyone else , Its my LIFE! Good Luck Cuz,
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Hey primo. I’m so proud of you. I’m so glad to hear that you’ve got that off your chest because I knew it was burden I know sometimes things don’t go accordingly especially when we set this whole dream of what our life is going to be. The reality is it’s never that easy and will never be that easy. We just keep plugging away and try do things that make us happy regardless of what others might think. What you’re doing is crazy but freaking amazing at the same time. You’re a free bird and biking one place to the other is you to a T. There’s not to many individual who can say ‘they’ve biked over 3k on a 1980’s Schwinn” lol. I hope that path still leads you to San Francisco because Marissa and I want to celebrate and be apart of your accomplishment. I love you Mark and I’ve said that many times drunk, not drunk, and 11,500 feet in the air on a mountain. I mean every word of it. Marissa and I will always be here for you.
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Mark, I am so happy for you! And jealous too cause I wish I could be there right now.I drove across the country a few years ago, taking my time and camping along the way… seen some really magical places…this country is truly beautiful:) And to be on the bike I can only imagine smelling the fresh air along the way….Wish you all the best and can’t wait to hear more about your adventures!
Love Radka
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Strong work mate. It’ll be brutal in parts but equally rewarding in many others. Keep it and I’ll see you at the finish line.
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Wow! thanks for disclosing to your friends,and family the challenge you have faced these years. It takes guts to let us know what is going on inside you. Depression is not easy to tackle by oneself,and I am glad you took charge,and got therapeutical assistance you needed. I feel so relieved that you did that. I have learned a lot about you,and I hope you trust me enough to feel free to discuss whatever you may be going through good or bad. I am here for you any time you like. You are a wonderful ,kind,intelligent human being. You deserve to be happy,and loved. After reading your blog,I discovered that You are also a hell of a writer! You are truly gifted.I am so happy that you are on track to discovering,and experiencing new adventures as well as finding out more about yourself.I am truly blessed to have an awesome nephew like you.Que vayas Con Dios!
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